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The Don Speaks : Part 3
Written by the arthritic fingers of Don HoriBOP   
Monday, 15 December 2003
We left Hori BOP deep in enemy territory at Waikato Stadium...

I had to change back from HoriBOP to human for a guided tour of what was and what wasn’t allowed on the precious turf. After a tour, an explanation of how brilliant and effective Little Chief was for the Chiefs, Mooloo was for the Chiefs, I mean Waikato and that the Green Zone was completely out of bounds (and a letter of compliance as well), I returned to the matchbox to find Mooloo getting changed. She turned out to be a he and he was disturbed at being in the same room as me. He mentioned that he’d heard about me and that I wasn’t allowed to touch
him and then left half-dressed. I’m not sure if he thought I was gay or violent or both!

I had a great day in front of the Green Zone, cheers Mafia and although I couldn’t get tickets to the after match function, I had the pleasure of smooth talking a couple of cool dudes in the lift into sneaking me in. When we got to the door a South African security guard had this guy to the side refusing him entry because he had no pass and no ID. I waltzed in behind these 2 guys and suggested they get a Waikato executive to help the guy get in. The guy was none other than John Mitchell – remember him, he was All Black coach once upon a time – so HoriBOP had the last laugh.

It was a real Waikato affair and I basically told Gary Dawson (who’s actually a bloody good sort of chap) that I, DON HORI BOP the First would grant him a reprieve from the Know Your Enemies section of the BOP Mafia web site if the deserving BoP players were given Chiefs status. Well, Gary, not only are you now firmly entrenched on the site, so are all your cronies, players and basically the whole bloody province!

A salute to JP of Rotorua whose accurate and fair-minded letter about our predicament as been published in papers and broadcast on the radio. HoriBOP would like to congratulate Jamie Troughton for his award and for his great reporting for the BOP Times this year. Also thanks to Coastline FM in Tauranga and Lake FM in Rotorua and the Daily Post for their reports.

Well fellow Steamers fans it was a bloody brilliant year and HoriBOP and HonkiBOP with the help of the ever growing and increasingly popular BoP Mafia website, promise that things will keep moving over summer. No matter whether you’re in Otago, London, Sydney, Siberia (poor bastards), Iraq (again poor bastards), or Waikato (get the hell out of there you poor bastards), we want to know about you and will never let you down in our pursuit of support and justice for our Steamers.

Today 9th November 2003 (a day after the glorious defeat of South Africa by the All Blacks, a division of BOP rugby) is the day HoriBOP officially declares war on anything Waikato. Protests will ensue, meetings of the war council will be called and Hori will push for a call to arms. We will not lie down and be dictated to by Dirty Scumbag Waikato just like we thrashed their arse in the preseason and development games and fought back in the 2nd half of the NPC game. They’ve brought trouble with Hori, Honki and the BoP Mafia in truck loads. All power to the Steamers under the best coach in the country, Saint Vern Cotter of Te Puke Sports.

It is a great pleasure to know Waikato’s official drink is the same colour as their river water which proves that God has indeed got a sense of humour and justice.

I salute you all.

Don HoriBOP the first

 
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