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29.07.03 - An introduction to cooking with Contrary to popular belief the BoP Steamers are not a collection of Tauranga/Rotorua chefs, although they are the home of the tastiest kiwifruit muffins and cakes and err… this year a rugby team.
No one likes to be the holder of the wooden spoon in the NPC, however that has been the occupation of the Steamers for the last two years (albeit in a caretaker capacity). This year they will attempt to hand over the prized cooking utensil to a new winner, one with even better recipes and ingredients. With that in mind, the following is a review of the top chefs that will battle for the prize of the ‘sandalwood stirrer’ and a free trip to the Hawkes Bay for an inter-divisional cook-off!Bay of Plenty.
The mighty BoP have a great mix of youth and experience this year and have managed to offload Jason “I can’t believe my hands are butter” Tiatia to the Brisbane Broncos. BoP supporters, will be hoping the return of Damon Kaui and Nathan Strongman will prevent the backline from leaking like a sieve. The new faces include Ben Castle, Bernie Upton, Mark Sorenson, Kevin Senio, Ray Macdonald and Roderick Labusachne. While senior players like Glen Jackson, Clayton Macmillan, Rodney Voullaire, Wayne Ormond, Aleki Lutui, Sims Davison, Tau Filise and Allan Bunting will be expected to lead from the front. Here is also hoping that ex-Japanese star Ryohei Miki, is not just an expert in sushi. Southland
Bluff oyster soup and Swede soufflés used to be the main contribution that Southland offered to the NPC first division. Their ingredients often spoil in travel and they usually come unstuck on the away fixtures, (or when they are complaining about the quality of the opposition cooking facilities. Eg Tauranga). However the men from the Deep South boast a formidable line up and are tough to beat at home. Their forward pack is led by stalwart Steve Jackson, and will have rising stars Clarke Dermody and Daniel Quate in their tight five. A loose forward trio of Ben Herring (leaving for Wellington after the NPC), Hale T-Pole and Paul Miller will be one of the better combinations in the NPC. NZ U21 Jimmy Cowan, will be dangerous and rumour has it that Seru Rabeni may not be going to the WRC to help Southland remain in the first division. It will be difficult to see these guys stirring the custard. Northland
The winterless north is famous for Kerikeri oranges and is the home of the tall timber (Glenn Taylor and Norm Maxwell), well Glenn Taylor is still around. Northland has regained the services of Milton Going and Norm Berryman this year, but the retirement of Alan Tubbs and Brett Waaka and the departure of Hayden Taylor will cause them some trouble. Given that Fero Lasagavibau, and Rupeni Caucaunibuca are all likely to be in Fiji’s world cup squad, (and possibly Vula Maimuri) Northland will be hoping that the secret handshake deals that secured James Arlidge and Mose Tuiali’i for Derren Witcombe pays off otherwise it could be a long NPC for them, culminating with a trip to sunny Hastings. Warm up games include big losses to the NZ u21s and Counties. North Harbour
The surprise contenders in the cook off last year, North Harbour, will try to stay out of the kitchen this year. Returning from injury Ron Cribb will add some much need strength to their forward pack (as well as a crab bisque), while the angry chefs of Troy Flavell and Matua Parkinson will add experience when not throwing their utensils at other players. Ex-BoP boys, Tevita Taumoepeau, Greg Rawlinson, Craig Newby, Hayden Reid, Rico Gear…etc strengthen their side, while rising star Luke McAlister will be looking for a solid second NPC. Returning Blair Larsen will add to the mix, while big seasons will be expected by Slade McFarlane, Tony Woodcock, Tusi Pisi, Anthony Tuitavake and Dan Parkinson. Hosea Gear will get lots of attention when he makes his debut, while unavailable due to injury Andrew Gallagher, Brad Miller and Karl Te Nana will be missed. Certainly this kitchen looks well equipped on paper, or will they struggle with the consistency like last year? Waikato
The last contender for the cook off gets in on merit for “poaching” ability, and pre-season pastry performances. Trying to serve up their best gastronomical delights; Waikato have entertained us with pre-season losses to the mighty BoP and North Harbour. With key injuries to their head chef, Johnno Gibbes, and other notable players such as Mark Ranby, David Hill, Dave Duley and Tony Philp. The WRC will see Marty Holah and Greg Smith out of the mix, leaving the Mooloo boys searching for depth in their own union. This still gives them time to search as far as BoP and Counties. (Dirty Scumbag Waikato). However, they do have a host of talent remaining including up and coming Liam Messam (poached), the returning Deacon Manu (freshly trained in the art of lattés), Keith Lowen, Keith Robinson, Rhys Duggan, Reagan King et al. Unlike the Super 12, these guys thrive in the NPC, so not really a genuine contender, but worthy of a mention all the same. Potential BoP Strategies:
Win some games (this is always a good solution)
Collect bonus points (a Chief’s specialty)
Inject salmonella into Paul Miller’s pies
Use Baron’s death ray ™ |
